Self R E S P E C T


The word epidemic is thrown around a lot. Usually unnecessarily. In this instance however, I think I am totally justified in saying, as a modern woman, there is an epidemic of self disrespect going around my fellow females.

Just in the past few days of information gathering about new possibly exciting; possibly terrifying ,events in my life, I have been speaking to many different women of many different backgrounds and ages and it has really come to my attention how down about themselves so many women are.

I am trying very hard not to judge ANY of these women. I am not in the circumstances they live in so who am I to tell anyone whats right or wrong for them. So many women seem to be judging their self-worth on what their men think of them. Are they good enough for their man? Are they attractive enough, funny enough, clever enough, cool enough, etc… Some poor women even saying that they “throw it” to their man even if they don’t feel like it. What? Is your man really so much of a needy child that he can’t handle not getting any for a while.

Yeah, men are dogs. Thank you very much Valerie Solanas (Rest In Peace.) But a good man, a respectful partner in your relationship will respect you enough to give you the night off if you’re not into it and not give you a hard time about it or go chasing tail somewhere else.

Other women, living in these horrible and SCARY abusive situations with men. They stay, and they praise the man for what small creature comforts he ‘allows” them. I don’t understand the mentality of that. Being a woman who has been in my more than fair share of abusive relationships I still don’t know why one would stay. That’s the point. I was in them, but eventually you stop being the victim and you rescue yourself and get away from them. You don’t extol their so-called virtues because they let you buy a new pair of sunglasses to cover your swollen eye.

What have so many women in our country come to, how did they get like this? Do they really see themselves so lowly and undeserved of a happy and strong life? We MAKE BABIES for f*cks sake! We make them, carry them, birth them, feed them and still have time to do the damn laundry (when we feel like it.) We have the ability to far exceed our male counterparts. In fact, more and more on the financial side, women are becoming the main breadwinners in families. We have for a long time been the emotional glue holding things together.

Perhaps I am making too general statements. I guess I am just going off my own life experience. I have always hung out with the guys. Not as their toss around toy, but as an equal. More than, because everything they did I had to do it harder and better to be considered on the same level. I had to mosh and fight and swear and out drink any man I knew. I had a blast at it too. Men think a lot differently than women do, you can’t be all touchy feely and crap in the circles I hung around. It made me tough. It made me able to see how freaking amazing I am.

Now, years later, settled into a comfortable married life with a good man for a husband and not a scumbag, I have softened around the edges of course. Happily so in fact. I can still out brawl any of my guy friends though, and I would like to see ANY one of them handle to biological torture of childbirth! They would all weep like little children, even my big burly guy friends.

Ladies, I am not saying lets put ourselves on pedestals and sneer down at the poor men wriggling in their own waste because without us that’s what they would be doing, I am saying we are EQUAL to them. If you are in a relationship where your partner thinks it’s a kindness not to use the belt to hit you just his hand, then you have to get help. Same goes if you are in a relationship where your man makes you feel less than you are, even if he doesn’t physically hit you it still is a blow. YOU ARE CAPABLE OF AMAZING THINGS. The best part is, you don’t need a man to accomplish them, you can do it yourself.

That is not even saying ANYTHING about how women are portrayed in society, the media etc… The fact that mothers, especially soon to be or newer mothers are treated downright as second class citizens by our own government and it is perfectly NORMAL to everyone tells me something is very wrong with how American culture views its women.

It is NOT OK that we only get six weeks to three months to be with our newborns before our job security is up. It is not right that many doctors still pressure women into thinking their own bodies can’t handle birthing and feeding their own babies. It is not right that we get shoved thru the hospital system like cattle on an assembly line during labor. It is not right that stay at home moms are treated lesser and looked down on by society in general. It is not right that working moms are pressured into feeling guilty for not staying home by other parts of society. It is NOT right that the government wants to take away our rights as a woman to choose.

Don’t you see ladies? Don’t you see what our culture is doing? Stand up, fight for our rights. Fight to be treated as a competent and intelligent equal capable of making your own decisions. Your not a pin-up. Your not a land whale. Your whatever the hell you want to be, don’t let any man or government take that away from you. Lets stop petty disagreements over who’s better than who, as women we are all awesome. it is time more of us remembered that.

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