Posts Tagged ‘ baby ’

High Mamma’s

It’s all over social media: The Stir, The Bump, Babycenter, even breastfeeding advocate sites like Breastfeeding Mama Talk. Mommy confessions pleading for no judgement and for understanding. Throngs of people behind them encouraging them and applauding them for being so brave to “come out.” Quoting psedo-science or poorly understood misconstrued facts. Giving examples of how modern they all are; and quickly shutting down anyone who is a buzzkill by disagreeing. How judgmental and “sancti-momious” art thou who doesn’t agree!

Whats the newest Mommy Confession that’s got everyone going? Using marijuana and other cannabis products while pregnant and/or breastfeeding.

With all the new information we have coming out about medical uses for cannabis, I decided to put on my tolerance hat and research the science myself with an open mind. I am of the mind that my opinion is allowed to change on something should there be sufficient proof that it should change.

After doing some internet research, and getting a very incomplete understanding of the newest research into cannabinoids as well as decades old studies, I decided the only way to get information that was not decades old or agenda driven would be to actually talk to an expert myself.

I emailed several scientists I found after reading a few research papers and finally one emailed me back. He was currently very busy organizing a convention; however he steered me towards one of his collaborators. Dr. Joseph Morgan was gracious enough to give me a phone interview and answer a few questions. Dr. Morgan has been an independent consultant for the pharmaceutical industry for twenty-five years. He has trained in cannabinoid medicine. I also emailed a woman named Rosie who works at a recreational marijuana dispensary in Colorado. She has also worked at a medical dispensary. Most of the technical information contained in this article (unless otherwise sited) is from these two sources.

First, I feel a few definitions are needed.

Cannabinoid: A unique chemical that interacts with the Endocannabinoid system found in animals. Can be found in the cannabis plant, as well as other places. There are anywhere from 70 to several hundred known Cannabinoids; including synthetic ones.

Endocannabinoid: A system in the body that interacts with other systems and has been discovered in the past 25 years. The receptors of this system vary widely in density and shape and that is largely dependent on genetics. The number of receptors found in each person also fluctuates as the body attempts to maintain balance. For example; if someone uses cannabis often they would have less receptors then a person who never uses.

Clean Cannabis: Medical grade marijuana that should be grown under specific conditions. Often grown hydroponically or using coconut bark ideally.

Recreational Cannabis: Marijuana, grown at home or from a dealer or dispensary. Growing conditions may or may not be known. May or may not have traces of pesticides, mold, fungus, bacteria. If grown in soil may contain unsafe levels of heavy metals; at least unsafe for pregnant or breastfeeding women as well as fetus/baby.

THC: Tetrahydrocannabinol. The cannabinoid found in marijuana that is responsible for much of the “high” feelings many people experience while using recreational marijuana. It causes the body to react and respond in a similar way to cannabinoids found in our bodies, however is NOT the same as the cannabinoids found in our bodies. THC bonds to the naturally occurring cannabinoid receptors (see term Endocannabinoid) in our body.

Synthetic THC: Created by people, this substance is purely THC.

CB1: A relevant cannabinoid receptor in our body; part of the endocannabinoid system. Is activated by THC and Synthetic THC. CB1 receptors decrease with persons who use cannabis heavily.

CBD: Another cannabinoid found in cannabis; a lot of research into this compound. This may be very helpful especially for future medical research. Does not have psychoactive properties of THC, and blocks the CB1 receptor in the endocannabinoid system.

So what does this mean for moms? Specifically breastfeeding moms?

For medical use, using should not be taken lightly. It may or may not be able to help with certain issues. Dr. Morgan specifically sited sufferers of Crohns Disease, saying that medicinal cannabis use may improve the health of the mother overall and reduce the need for more toxic medicines;  therefor would be beneficial to the baby in that way.

Essentially: the benefits in a circumstance like that would outweigh the costs. It is for a well-informed doctor to make this decision with the patient; not a decision someone should just decide on by themselves.

Dr. Morgan was very clear about possible harm from recreational use of cannabis not only to the mother but also being transferred to baby via breastmilk or umbilical cord. He spoke about toxins on the plant or in the plant that would cause harm to mother and child. Specifically we know the effects of pesticides, fungus, bacteria, and mite infestation. He especially warned against “neurotoxicity pesticide contamination issues.” One thing he spoke of that I did not already know was that the plant itself draws in heavy metals from the soil which then goes into the mother’s body and the baby’s. This includes mercury and lead as well as others.

Many of the compounds found in cannabis are fat soluble, which means they do end up in breastmilk, including whatever “tag-alongs” are in it. It should be noted that concentrates (such as oils and wax etc…) will also contain the pesticides of the plant it was derived from.

I also specifically asked Dr. Morgan the difference between cannabinoids found in cannabis and cannabinoids found in the body naturally. He explained that they are not at all the same. He explained the ones the body makes are used for on demand purposes, they remain in the body a few seconds at a time. Those found in cannabis can be active in your system for hours and can be detected in your system for weeks. He also said that on a chemical level they are structurally different. The similarity, he says, is that they both activate the receptors in the endocannabinoid system.

We all know that people react differently to cannabis use. I myself do not find it enjoyable and never “got into it” spare a few experiments in college. I asked Dr. Morgan how we can know if use will effect a mothers ability to care for her child coherently. He said that the receptors for everyone are genetically coded and vary in shape and density and number. At this time their is no way to accurately say how it will effect a mothers ability or not since everyone reacts so differently. Dr. Morgan specifically stated that minimum amounts should be used for medication.

Dr. Morgan did have some very interesting theory’s about cannabinoid deficiency’s in the mother being a possible explanation for why some infants are termed as “failure to thrive.” If you are not familiar with this term; here is a link. If this was the case a prescription of cannabis could possibly help he says. This would require further study of course; of which is currently difficult given the strict government regulations and restrictions on the topic.

I think out of everything I have learned during this project, that is the biggest flag for me. The uncertainty of it all. The bottom line is we do not have a lot of current studies on this subject. The answers are still unclear on exact effects of THC and other cannabis compounds on the developing fetus and nursing child, positive or negative. As I mentioned earlier; in a medical necessity situation the doctor must go over the benefits versus the costs with the patient.

Here is where it gets a bit tricky. As I mentioned earlier, I also interviewed Rosie who has worked at medical and recreation dispensary’s in Colorado. I do not know a lot about whats going on at a consumer level so her insight was very interesting.

In Colorado it is legal to sell cannabis products to pregnant and nursing mothers. Rosie said she has sold to pregnant moms and said, “I assume it will be used responsibly.”  She tells me that from what she knows both medical and recreational dispensary’s grow product in soil. She prefers the taste of cannabis grown hydroponically. I myself was quite alarmed at the information that medical dispensaries grow product in soil considering what I now know about heavy metals in the plant. She says the main differences between a medical dispensary and a recreational dispensary are the amounts being sold and the amount of taxes for each sale.

From what I have learned it seems more regulation is needed on a local level. More research is needed which means less regulation on a national level. More awareness is needed. More education on the subject.

Dr. Morgan hopes that in the future of this research we could see a higher quality of research and a better safer cleaner product being used. This means a lot of the government restrictions that has held up the last few decades are actually causing more harm than good at this point.

One thing is very clear it seems; no matter where this research takes us in the future, RIGHT NOW, unless medically nessisary, pregnant and nursing moms should not use cannabis products. The know effects of cannabis with “dubious purity” are known for sure and none of it is good.

Who knows; a few years down the road our understanding of this might become clearer. In the meantime, why take any unnecessary risk?

 

______________________________________________________

Dr. Joseph Morgan is currently working on “legal and safer plant mimicking for FDA approval” in response to some of the issue mentioned above.

Rosie is newly engaged and living life! Congratulations Rosie!

A GIGANTIC THANK YOU to both Dr. Morgan and Rosie for helping with this post!!!! It is truly appreciated!

A Brief Catch-You-Up

Hello Hello Again Internet-land!

Here I am again. With a 6 month old asleep on my chest, a 2 year old napping in bed and a 4 year old having quiet play-time.

Yes, we did it again. Little Gooey joined Mogwai and Pumpkinhead in our wonderful family of five humans and two felines. She came comparably quickly a few days before Christmas. Hubby then promptly got himself neutered. Except; the way they do it to humans so really not a “neuter.” I will perhaps write a blog about her birth story later.

I am back where I belong zookeeping again as well. I found a wonderful facility that has been so flexible to allow me to continue to spend the majority of my time with the kids; but still let me work enough to be sane and have some of my pre-baby identity back. I am very pleased with my current work situation.

We started our homeschooling journey a few months back. Well, I started it as I am doing all of the preparatory work. We have been introducing the concept of schooling at home to Pumpkinhead and she seems fine so far. We don’t officially start until September 1st. I will try to blog about it. We have a lot of reasons for homeschooling, none of which I am going to go into with this entry.

Hubby is enjoying his creative freedom at work and getting to do what he loves; cook for people and make them happy.

We celebrated five years of marriage this year. Hooray! Went to the spa together, got a fancy-schmancy upscale hotel room. Ended up with Gooey staying with us that night as she wouldn’t eat for Gramma and wouldn’t sleep. Such is having kids! We still had an amazing time and I can not even begin to imagine how I got so lucky as to have the life I have now.

We also a while back moved into a better and bigger apartment with an amazing back yard.

I also turned 30 this year… mixed feeling on that of course. On one hand, looking back at my accomplishments and what I have lived through I feel pretty proud. On the other hand I feel like I have so much more to do! For now, happy in my space.

January 2015

January 2015

Why do I love my breasts?

My son is about 5 1/2 months and as we begin to prepare to start him on “solid” food I have been thinking about how amazing my breasts are. I have had a complicated relationship with them, as most modern women have I think.

Before they arrived I envied my friend who developed early (although as I hear it now 5th grade is becoming the standard for girls to develop and is no longer considered early…) and watched another friend pretend to have them by stuffing balloons with pudding and putting them in a bra. Because it was so important apparently to have them. If only I knew then what I know now!

When they finally first “arrived” around age 15 trying to figure out how the heck I was supposed to snap in those hooks in the middle of my back. Trying to also understand why they weren’t DD’s immediately like all the women on TV, and feelings of inadequacy for years because they never made it past a small B until I got pregnant at 25. Feeling like they were ugly and imperfect for years because a male friend commented negatively about the size of my nipples. The up’s and downs of push-up bra’s, padding, and finally the acceptance of my size and subsequent flaunting that follows.

During my first pregnancy the nervousness and excitement as they got bigger and bigger (and consequently more sore and tender.) I knew I was going to breastfeed my daughter. I didn’t really know what that entailed other then insert nipple and baby will eat. Oh, so much left to learn! At the time I didn’t have any breastfeeding friends that I knew of, and the one mom who I was “close” with (close as in my brothers girlfriend) was adamant about all the reasons she didn’t breastfeed (saggy boobs, she wanted to start drinking again etc…) I hadn’t met the new friends we would make in our mommy group yet, so I was pretty nervous about it the first time.

Then after giving birth, the long ordeal I went thru with supply issues, post-partum depression, self image, a screaming hungry baby, an unsupportive pediatrician, a distant husband and in general frustration and disappointment with myself and my breasts. It was a struggle, but we did manage to breastfeed for 7 months, however we did start supplementing with formula around 1 1/2 – 2 months. They certainly were bigger (up to a C at this point) but they were always sore and sensitive, and someone was always wanting them for one reason or another yet they couldn’t supply enough for anybody to be happy!

I am GLAD we struggled though, because those quiet moments I got to have when breastfeeding my daughter still remain some of the most special moments of her infant days to me. Take away all the facts of how beneficial breastfeeding is to mom and baby, the happy hormones released and the antibodies and how its free. What it came down to was it made my daughter happy and when she would look into my eyes in those quiet spaces I never felt so amazing and close to her. The happy hormones work and bonding is achieved, but in the moment you arent thinking of that. You are falling in love with your child.

After we stopped breastfeeding fully they did shrink back down a little, but they finally felt “normal” again. I do feel like I lost a bit of that bonding time with her, when it was just us. But I feel our relationship is so close and special now because we both worked so hard together. I had a bit of a respite where I didn’t have to think about my breasts at ALL (imagine that for a moment ladies) and then I got out of the shower one day and they started leaking again… I knew I was pregnant again in that moment.

My second pregnancy was so full of everything else going on I barely had time to think about them. Of course, they grow and prepare for baby without conscious thought so again I broke out my pregnancy bra’s. They didn’t get sore this time really until the end of the pregnancy. I also knew much more about breastfeeding this time and felt excited for my baby to arrive so I could do it again.

At the beginning of course there was the usual waiting for my milk to come in, but I wasn’t as afraid this time since I now knew a newborn can go a few days without having a real meal and he was getting colostrum so he was OK. He latched well and almost immediately after birth. Getting my supply up was still difficult, but this time I knew to take feenugreek, and to keep taking my prenatal vitamins and about active nursing. I knew to take good care of myself and to drink LOTS of water, and I actually actively did it. It still took about 2 weeks for Mogwai and I to find out feeding groove, but this time I was confidant we would.

I love our pediatrician and she was so supportive. My wonderful husband is also amazing and has been so supportive and extra helpful as well. I cannot even stress how crucial the support of those two people has been. I also am part of a mommy group with members who breastfeed, so seeing them unafraid to do it in public has also given me support even when it’s just the two of us.

Also, although I am not a particularly religious person, I find a great deal of strength from the images of the “Maria lactans.” and the nursing Isis.

At this moment in time, my son has doubled his birth weight and is healthy and vibrant and I am so PROUD to say my breasts did that. He has not had a drop of anything other then breast milk and yet he is thriving. As his mother and as a women in general I feel so amazing. It wasn’t always easy, and sometimes I still need a “booby break” where nobody is allowed to be near them for awhile.

I finally feel like my breasts are more then just the sum of the size cups they can fill or how many men notice them or think they are attractive. They are not some separate entity that needs perfecting and needs work or approval. They are part of my body and they are amazing exactly as they are, “large” nipples and all! I ❤ my breasts!

-Courtesy of Glimpse in Time Photography-

-Courtesy of Glimpse in Time Photography-

 

P.S.

This post is NOT knocking other women who choose not to/are unable to breastfeed. I am simply recounting my own personal journey with my breasts. Relax. 🙂

Your Babies Gut…

…WAS NOT DESIGNED TO DIGEST ANYTHING OTHER THEN BREAST MILK UNTIL AT LEAST 4-6 MONTHS!

Formula is a suitable substitute for breast milk, go ahead and use it if you want to.

You know what is NOT OK? Rice freaking cereal or cow’s milk!!! In fact it is dangerous! Their little brand new digestive system is not ready for such heavy stuff! In the long-term it can cause allergies, Gastrointestinal issues, lead to early onset diabetes, and obesity. In the short-term it can cause constipation and confusion.

Some people seem to think it helps with acid reflux and will help a baby sleep better through the night. They have formula designed for babies with acid reflux, if your breastfeeding you don’t get acid reflux at all and sleeping through the night… really? You want to trade you child’s life long health so you can maybe get a full nights rest? Seriously?

Crying Mogwai

The AAP, the WHO, and UNICEF all recommend waiting until 6 months before even starting anything not liquid. They have tiny little tummies, they are supposed to eat a little at a time. Why are we always in such a rush in this country to make our kids grow up? Like we expect them to come out of the womb and be ready to get a job….

OK, maybe not that grown up but we Do put unnecessary timelines on our kids.  Some of my peers are calling 36 weeks “full term” for a pregnancy. They aren’t even born yet and we want them to hurry up! I know women who have scheduled elective c-sections at 36 weeks! That is insane!

Why can’t we just let them grow at there own pace? Let things happen without freaking out that they are slow or behind? It’s like if they don’t fit into our lives or our schedules then something must be wrong with them. Does anybody else see how crazy that sounds? They have just taken a breath and opened there eyes to the sun for the first time and we want them to eat big people food and walk and be quiet and sleep 8 hours a night and take two solid 4 hour naps a day and be happy all alone in a swing or crib four hours and hours each day. We expect so much of THEM, why don’t we expect more of ourselves? How about a little understanding? Why don’t WE take a step back and realize they can not conform to our pre-set determination of their day-to-day life. That it is OUR lives that need re-evaluation to fit around them. Eventually, they will naturally fall into a set sleep pattern and eat on a regular schedule and do all the things we want if we as adults could just be patient. It think it would make everyone, mother and child, much happier.

This is something I wish I had known with my first. I wish I had just had more patience in the beginning. She was such a difficult baby, but I had such high standards of what society told me a baby was “supposed” to be like. She wasn’t fitting into the mold I saw all around me in the media and what our pediatrician at the time said she ought to, so my anxiety rose as I thought something must be “wrong” with her. Looking back, their was nothing wrong with her at all. It is not wrong for an infant to want to nurse every two hours or every 20 minutes, or to want to use mom as a pacie. It is not wrong for an infant to want to be held all the time and to not want to sleep alone. I hate sleeping alone, when my husband would close the restaurant and not get home until 3 am I could never sleep right. How could I expect an infant to happily sleep all alone?

At two months she did not weigh as much as some chart said she ought to weigh. The pediatrician basically convinced me she was starving to death and I was letting it happen by refusing to use formula. I gave in and began to supplement with formula at night and she put on lots of weight fast. I wish at the time someone had told me that breastfed babies arent (generally speaking) as heavy as those fed formula. That the chart that most pediatricians use is based on average weights of formula fed babies. I didn’t take into account my genetics or my husbands (both of us petite babies and children.) All I heard was her doctor telling me she was underweight and my breasts weren’t cutting it. We continued to supplement, relying more heavily on formula until about 7 months when our daughter decided she didn’t want the breast anymore at all. She still took formula at night until her first birthday when she decided she didn’t want that anymore either. I wish I had just worked harder to up my supply. I had been making enough, I just hadn’t been making any extra.

I am beyond proud to say that we are nearly 12 weeks with our son and he has yet to have a drop of formula. Honestly, it hasn’t been easy. As much as I let him nurse and as much as I pump and take my prenatal’s and fenugreek and eat my oatmeal I am still not gushing and overflowing with milk. I envy those women who have ounces and ounces stored in the freezer. Currently I have 6 oz in the freezer and another 4 in the fridge… and those were collected on chance and luck. Normally he eats as much as I make, no more no less. But that is OK too. He is healthy and we have managed this time (so far) to be much more relaxed parents and not freak out over every little thing. I feel, all around, we are a much happier family unit and he is a much happier baby because I am going with his flow. He is a fat little baby and I am so proud to say that my breasts did that!

Happy Mogwai eating

Happy Mogwai Eating

Like usual, it appears I have ranted off my original topic. So, I say again, don’t give your babies solid food (including rice cereal) or cows milk (or goat milk or wolverine milk or soy milk) until they are at least 4 months; and even then don’t rush it! They will tell you when they are ready. They have the rest of their lives to eat sugar and starch and peas and carrots. It’s just not necessary or worth it to rush.

New apartment, New town, New state

Here we are!

Internet is back on, I can give the updates now.

As my title states, we have crossed state lines into unknown territory and are now in a “townhouse;” or two-floor apartment, in a family friendly neighborhood on the outskirts of a relatively large city. It is no NYC or Syracuse even, but its bigger then the place we were just at. Close to three schools (although the school statistics for this entire state are mighty disheartening… active large online community for home school kids though…) within a stone throw of two playgrounds and even though it’s a complex… sorry community… there are a lot of families around us and by 9 pm all has been quiet on the home front. And a large active online mommy group for stay at home moms. Just what we wanted. The apartment is bigger then our last place by a little, the rent is WAY higher, but it seems to be a secure space so that’s OK. Hubby’s job is GREAT, he did take a $10,000 a year pay cut, BUT it has very affordable family health insurance, lots of opportunities for advancement, and seems like a great family oriented place. They even help him advance in his career by paying for school. Say he wanted to go to culinary school and get a degree so he could get a better job within their facility, they can make that happen. So, we are financially set back temporarily. I feel this place is like setting up some security for our future. We are also near a good zoo, it is a large zoo, BUT I do know a few people there and they do have a wild dog pack (I have dreamed of working with wild dogs, especially after my experience with the wolf pack at my old zoo; kind of personal career goal.) Not ready to go back to work full-time just yet, gotta have this baby first and raise it up a bit. Speaking of…

I am about 34 weeks now. I have only put on about 23 lbs so far. A far cry from the 60 lbs I put on with my first pregnancy, but a much healthier amount. I have also been more stressed out this last trimester and have not had access to a lot of food. So there’s that. Most of the food we did have I gave to our toddler, who has gone through another growth spurt during this transitional time; and if you didn’t know during growth spurts they eat like crazy and are extra fussy and tired. She now fits into 4T already, she is getting SO tall! She is barely two and a half and she’s that tall. Get’s it from her father of course.

The closest birth center is about two hours away, currently awaiting admission, should hear back by Thursday if they have accepted me. Had a few hiccups getting them my records, since I have had to change midwives twice this pregnancy. Obviously not by choice. Moving over 7 hours in 4 months time can do that. Been doing a lot of reading to prepare myself for this birth. I know I am wiser now and I am definitely more keen to how hospitals and doctors treat birthing women. I wanted a home birth this time; but they usually aren’t covered by insurance and we have moved so much it would have been hard to pin one down anyway. I would hate to be looking for a home birth midwife right now, especially since I am sure they are all booked up for my month. I did have a doula at the last place we were at, a dear old friend of mine who is training to become a CNM (certified nurse midwife) I was very sad to leave her. If I did get stuck with a hospital birth she was going to be my knight telling the doctors where they can shove there pitocin and other drugs and monitors and schedules and tubes etc… I will be happy to get into this birth center, it sounds like what I want. Come check me once and awhile to make sure the baby is safe but other than that let me walk around and breath and move and be calm and open. Let me do what my body was made to do and don’t stress me out! Is that so much to ask? In this country, yes. That’s a subject for an entire blog though. This one I am just updating our living situation.

All in all I have high hopes for our future here. I doubt we will stay in this exact apartment…townhouse… for more than a year, but it’s a good place to start. This is a good area and could lead to good things for us if we play our cards right. I would like to be closer to the ocean, but in time in time…

The lonely is already settling in, but that happens whenever you move, especially if you move far away. I miss my animals at the zoo, I miss my friends in both spaces we have been in in the past 4 months. I know my daughter is lonely too. She asks about her friends a lot. Now that we have internet I can hook up with a mommy group and get her some interaction with kids her own age! Her and Daddy are enjoying some quality time out of the house and giving me some quiet time for a bit, the first breather I have had in months. It’s not the same as playing with her own age group though. We can’t afford daycare, or I would put her in just for two or three days a week just so she could have some friends too. Gotta get in with the mommy group soon!

Don’t even want to discuss financial woes. We took out a small loan to move down here. Time to start paying that back! I have been thinking of joining Etsy; but so many people sell tutu’s I don’t know if I would even make a profit unless I expanded what I do. Going to try the consignment shops here first, lets see where that goes. A friend of mine who also makes really cool tutu’s said mine were really unique and would sell well. We shall see. Etsy has worked out great for my Aunt, but she is a very talented artist. No way anybody would buy the junk I scribble.

I know a lot of families around the country are having a harder time then we are. Things are bad all over. People keep talking how the recession is getting better. Honestly, for my circle and our life it seems like the recession has just hit. The past few years have been very prosperous. Suddenly all my friends are losing work and a lot of people in the military I know are being discharged for this reason or that reason. Not dishonorably or anything, just no more need for them I guess. I don’t know, I am not military, just know a lot in the service… or who used to be in the service anyway. My civilian friends are all seeming to get hours cut, business closing all over too. maybe the recession just took longer to hit the East Coast?

I will say one thing; we went to a food pantry for the first time ever in my life last week. Let me tell you that was hard. Even when I was homeless living out of my car I still didn’t go. Like I said, our toddler has been in a growth spurt during this transition, and I am pregnant I do need to eat a little bit now and then. So we went to the church and stayed in line for an hour and got 18 lbs of food; plus bread and eggs. It wasn’t as humiliating as I thought honestly. It felt good to have some food in the house again. I felt pretty awful though for us not having enough; even after taking out a loan and everything, to be able to keep enough food in the house. We don’t drink, we don’t do drugs, Hubby is down to less than one pack of smokes a week, we are both willing to work hard and we have just barely been carrying on a good living. It makes me wonder how others around the country are doing. People who do have addictions and issues. Our biggest expense is rent, food is number two on that expense list. I can’t imagine how hard things must be for others. Now that Hubby is going to be getting a steady paycheck again things should smooth out. We wont have enough for savings really like we did before the lay off, but we should be able to afford the necessities again at least. Thank God I saved all of the tot’s old infant stuff! We do need to go buy a new car seat, but I saved a gift card from x-mas to help with that. Frugal me always. Wish Hubby was the same! He spent $40 on food just for lunch today, his “victory” feast he called it. We did need a celebration but geeze home cooked food is supposed to be cheaper than dining out HAHAHA.

Yes, yes, I can hear it. You say stop complaining about money when you’re a stay at home mom! True, I could have this baby, heal and be back to work at any job full-time if I tried. That would add in quite a bit of income… or would it? My career, which I have been in since i was 15 and is VERY emotionally satisfying and I am well-trained to do and great at, unfortunately doesn’t pay well. So, right off the bat, I wouldn’t be able to go back into my field right away. So you say, call centers pay quite nicely. True that. I could do that, or be a waitress, or receptionist or a million other things. Add in the financial cost of daycare for a toddler and a newborn full-time. That’s a huge chunk of change.

Now, the most important part: if I went back to work full-time right after this baby is born, I would be giving over half my salary for people I barely know to raise my children for me. I am NOT going to get into the debate of working mom vs. stay at home mom. That’s not my bag. for OUR family, for what WE feel as a unit; letting a daycare raise our children is unacceptable. FOR US. In our personal beliefs and our family dynamic we feel that children need their parents as the primary caregivers. I have lots of friends who are working moms, that is what works for their family. That is their choice and I do NOT judge them for it. I am not living their lives and who would I be to impose my beliefs. Staying home doesn’t work for everybody, it’s not right for every family. But it is right for our family, and giving that up would cost more than any paycheck I could bring in would. Do I miss my career? Of course. But I have been zoo keeping for years, worked the shelters and animal hospitals before that and have a degree in Zoo Technology/Animal Management. I have not left my career. I am on an extended hiatus to take the best care of the most important people in my life in a manner that I see fit. I am young and there is plenty of time for me to go back to keeping full-time when the kids are old enough. Anyway, I still have my hand in the keeper cookie jar so to speak, so I am never too far away.

All life takes is a little determination and perseverance and you can get whatever you want…. unless what you want is to have a palace on the sun. That is not going to happen. Sorry. Everything else, just takes time. I think I am going to get in some Sim time before Hubby comes back with the tot and really relax awhile. Haven’t had time for Sims in months…

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